What is Absent Grief?

Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation • May 2, 2022
funeral home in Amboy, IL

Losing a loved one and going through their service at a funeral home in Amboy, IL is one of the hardest parts of life. What happens if you can’t grieve the loss of a loved one? What do you do if you feel like your emotions are frozen in place? Working through your grief over the loss is one of the best ways to heal from it, but if you can’t grieve, you might have absent grief.  

Absent grief is when someone shows little to no signs of normal grief, such as crying, lethargy, missing the deceased, or anger. Many doctors believe that this kind of grief comes from an underlying avoidance or denial of the loss. Symptoms of absent grief include no signs or symptoms of grieving whatsoever, irritability, forgetting about the loss, not feeling connected to the loss, and denial.  

Though absent grief is very common, many people don’t know much about it. Here are some fast facts about absent grief to provide guidance and context:  

 
  • Grief is often unexpected – Grief looks and feels different for everyone, so it’s often tough to pinpoint when someone is experiencing absent grief. Check in with yourself or the grieving person to see how you or they are feeling.  
  • Avoiding grief isn’t obvious – There are many ways people that experience absent grief try to avoid grieving. For example, they can focus on taking care of others, lose themselves in drugs or alcohol to numb the pain, or dive into work in order to distract themselves. 
  • Absent grief can have physical symptoms – Holding in your feelings of loss can take a toll on the body, leading to heart palpitations, insomnia, fatigue, or eating disorders.  
  • Death isn’t the only event that can cause absent grief – Other life events besides death can cause absent grief, including divorce, job loss, regret, or loss of a romantic relationship or a friendship. 
  • Anticipatory grief can lead to absent grief – Anticipatory grief is when someone grieves a loss before its actually happened. Oftentimes, if you grieve before a death, you won’t feel as much pain after the death.   
  • You can move on - You can move on from absent grief. Once you accept the loss you can work through your pain and grief to move forward with your life. If you need help doing so, don’t be ashamed. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help.  funeral home in Amboy, IL
  • Absent grief isn’t just denial – The “denial” stage of grief is when you try and deny the death happened. Most people face denial in the first few hours or days after a loss. But denial becomes absent grief when the denial continues on much longer.  
  • It’s OK if you weren’t close to the deceased – Some might feel like they have absent grief if they aren’t grieving, but it might simply be that they just weren’t that close to the deceased. If that’s the case, it’s OK. You don’t have to demonstrate deep grief over someone you weren’t close to.  

Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation is here to help if you have more questions on absent grief, dealing with a loss, or Amboy, IL funeral homes. Call or visit us today to learn more about what we can for you in your time of loss or of preplanning.

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December 8, 2025
Saying goodbye to someone you love is one of the most profound experiences a family can face, and during such emotional times many turn to cremation services Morrison, IL for guidance that feels compassionate and clear. Grief can create uncertainty, and it becomes especially important to have caring professionals who can offer structure while ensuring your wishes are honored with sincerity and respect. At Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation, we understand the need for patience, warmth, and gentle direction. We believe every tribute should reflect the individuality of the person being remembered, and we support families with steady reassurance as they make meaningful decisions during a difficult moment. Creating Meaningful Moments of Remembrance Honoring a loved one begins with understanding the moments, memories, and qualities that made their life special. Families often find comfort in selecting elements that reflect their loved one’s personality, such as thoughtfully chosen music, heartfelt messages, cherished photographs, or symbolic touches that highlight what mattered most to them. These details bring warmth to the experience and offer a sense of connection for those who gather to remember. Our role is to help families feel supported as they make these choices, creating a setting that encourages reflection, comfort, and togetherness during an emotionally tender time. Guiding Families with Steady and Compassionate Support We understand that planning can feel overwhelming when emotions are strong, which is why supportive guidance matters so deeply. As families sort through decisions, we provide clarity to help them feel grounded and informed. With each step, we answer questions, offer thoughtful suggestions, and provide gentle direction so the process feels less daunting. Many families appreciate knowing they are not alone but instead have a caring partner to help them create a tribute that feels heartfelt and peaceful. For those who wish to explore service options further, more information is available at our service page section. Honoring Every Family’s Needs with Flexibility and Care Every family brings different wishes, traditions, and expectations to the planning process, which is why flexibility can bring comfort. Some prefer a quiet, intimate gathering, while others may want a more structured setting that brings people together to share memories and support one another. Our approach allows families to move at their own pace and choose what feels right for them. When their preferences are honored, families are better able to focus on reflection rather than stress, creating a tribute that feels genuine and aligned with their values. This kind of supportive environment helps the healing process begin naturally. A Thoughtful Approach to Honoring a Life When faced with the passing of a loved one, families often experience a mix of emotions and questions. What should the tribute look like? Which elements reflect their personality best? How can we ensure the farewell feels heartfelt and respectful? This is where having an experienced and compassionate partner becomes invaluable. We help families create a tribute that preserves their loved one’s story while also providing comfort through every decision. Because every life is unique, the details you choose help shape a farewell rooted in love, reflection, and connection. Honoring a loved one is a significant act of love, and choosing supportive professionals can bring comfort and clarity when you need it most. If your family is looking for compassionate guidance while considering cremation services Morrison, IL, we invite you to reach out to Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation so we can help you create a meaningful tribute shaped with care, understanding, and warmth. Our team is here to offer steady support and thoughtful direction, helping your family move forward with peace while ensuring your loved one’s life is remembered with dignity and heartfelt appreciation.
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