Grief Myths and Cremation Services

By: Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation
Monday, January 11, 2021

Most people don’t understand grief at all even though everyone will experience grief after a cremation service in Amboy, IL at some point. Here are some of the most common myths about grief and their truths: 

  • Staying Connected to the Deceased Makes You Crazy – How many movies have you seen where the widow is worried over and considered “crazy” for holding onto her dead husband’s shirts or talking to him at his gravesite? This couldn’t be further from the truth. Its healthy to continue your connection with the deceased. In fact, many cultures around the world have deep tradition in connecting with the deceased through rituals, songs, conversations, songs and keepsakes. The book Continuing Bonds: New Understandings of Grief says, “remaining connected seemed to facilitate the bereaved’s ability to cope with loss and accompanying changes in their lives.” 
  • A Death is a Loss – While people often refer to death as a “loss”, death doesn’t mean that someone is gone forever. Their memory, goodness, and even wisdom can live on through the people they met and loved in life. After all, how can you lose someone when you hold them dearly and deeply in their heart?  
  • Grief Eventually Ends in Closure – This couldn’t be further from the truth. Grief is non-linear and generally has no end or “closure” when you can sign and move on completely. Grief can change over time, but it won’t ever completely go away. Eleanor Haley from What’s Your Grief says, “Grief isn’t something you go through, it’s something that becomes a part of you. It’s forever.”  
  • Remembering the Deceased Means Staying in the Past – Remembering a loved one doesn’t mean staying in the past, it can mean connecting to them in a new and meaningful way that changes as time goes on. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that the only way to stay connected to the deceased is to remember past times. But your relationship with the deceased doesn’t have to stay the same. Continuing Bonds: New Understandings of Grief states, “Instead [of a static relationship], they evolve and mature right along with us”. A healthy way of grieving a loss is to keep the deceased part of new experiences and new memories.  
  • You Need to Move on from the Loss – Oftentimes those in mourning feel a societal pressure to move on from the loss. However, there isn’t really a way to move on or detach from a loss. Grief doesn’t go away. Instead, it changes. In the early months you might grieve by sitting in the dark and crying, but as time goes on you might grieve by lighting a candle once a year. Also, there shouldn’t be any pressure to leave the deceased behind. The deceased can, and often should, always be a part of you and your life, even though that part may change with time. 

Do you want to learn more about grief or Amboy, IL cremation services? Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation is here to help. Stop by and visit us today.  

Leave a comment
Name*:
Email:
Comment*:
Please enter the numbers and letters you see in the image. Note that the case of the letters entered matters.

Comments

Please wait

Previous Posts

What Happens if You Can’t Pay for Funeral Home Services?

Funerals don’t have to be extravagant and expensive, but they do cost money. What do you do if you can’t afford a funeral at a funeral home in Fulton, IL?   Here are answers to common qu...

Interesting Facts About Urns

What do you know about cremation urns? If you’re like most people, the first time you’ve ever thought about cremation urns is right before or after a cremation service in Amboy, IL. But it always b...

What is Absent Grief?

Losing a loved one and going through their service at a funeral home in Amboy, IL is one of the hardest parts of life. What happens if you can’t grieve the loss of a loved one? What do you do if yo...

Gravesite Decoration After Cremation Services and Burial

A great way to celebrate your lost loved one’s life, honor their passing, and soothe the feelings of loss is by decorating their gravesite after their burial and cremation service in Morrison, IL.&...

How to Decorate a Gravesite After a Funeral Home Service

How do you decorate or personalize a gravesite? Personalizing your lost loved one’s graveside with decorations after a funeral home service in Morrison, IL is a wonderful way to recognize their pas...

The Benefits of Cremation Over Burial

There are many who prefer cremation services in Fulton, IL, even though traditional burial is still very popular for many reasons. In fact, some might argue that cremation is quickly becoming the s...

What is Prolonged Grief?

There are many types of grief that people can experience after a loss and a service at a funeral home in Fulton, IL. One common type is called prolonged grief.   Prolonged grief is when ...

Do You Know What Abbreviated Grief Is?

Abbreviated grief, like the name signifies, is mourning that doesn’t last a long time. Though its short, or abbreviated, this kind of grief isn’t any less real than other kinds. Whether you’re plan...

What Are Last Wishes Documents?

Your last wishes are your requests for what you want done after you die, generally regarding funeral or memorial arrangements and final disposition. A last wishes document is how you can tell your ...

Activity Ideas for Your Memorial Guests

It’s common for memorials after cremation services in Morrison, IL and other locations are much more than one-day events. This is especially true if people are traveling from out of town for the se...