Grief Myths and Cremation Services
January 11, 2021
Most people don’t understand grief at all even though everyone will experience grief after a cremation service in Amboy, IL at some point. Here are some of the most common myths about grief and their truths:
- Staying Connected to the Deceased Makes You Crazy – How many movies have you seen where the widow is worried over and considered “crazy” for holding onto her dead husband’s shirts or talking to him at his gravesite? This couldn’t be further from the truth. Its healthy to continue your connection with the deceased. In fact, many cultures around the world have deep tradition in connecting with the deceased through rituals, songs, conversations, songs and keepsakes. The book Continuing Bonds: New Understandings of Grief says, “remaining connected seemed to facilitate the bereaved’s ability to cope with loss and accompanying changes in their lives.”
- A Death is a Loss – While people often refer to death as a “loss”, death doesn’t mean that someone is gone forever. Their memory, goodness, and even wisdom can live on through the people they met and loved in life. After all, how can you lose someone when you hold them dearly and deeply in their heart?
- Grief Eventually Ends in Closure – This couldn’t be further from the truth. Grief is non-linear and generally has no end or “closure” when you can sign and move on completely. Grief can change over time, but it won’t ever completely go away. Eleanor Haley from What’s Your Grief says, “Grief isn’t something you go through, it’s something that becomes a part of you. It’s forever.”
- Remembering the Deceased Means Staying in the Past – Remembering a loved one doesn’t mean staying in the past, it can mean connecting to them in a new and meaningful way that changes as time goes on. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that the only way to stay connected to the deceased is to remember past times. But your relationship with the deceased doesn’t have to stay the same. Continuing Bonds: New Understandings of Grief states, “Instead [of a static relationship], they evolve and mature right along with us”. A healthy way of grieving a loss is to keep the deceased part of new experiences and new memories.
- You Need to Move on from the Loss – Oftentimes those in mourning feel a societal pressure to move on from the loss. However, there isn’t really a way to move on or detach from a loss. Grief doesn’t go away. Instead, it changes. In the early months you might grieve by sitting in the dark and crying, but as time goes on you might grieve by lighting a candle once a year. Also, there shouldn’t be any pressure to leave the deceased behind. The deceased can, and often should, always be a part of you and your life, even though that part may change with time.
Do you want to learn more about grief or Amboy, IL cremation services ? Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation is here to help. Stop by and visit us today.
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Since 1975, Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation has been dedicated to offering families compassionate and personalized funeral services. With nearly five decades of experience, we have earned a reputation as a trusted provider among funeral homes Morrison, IL . We recognize that each funeral service should be as unique as the individual it honors. Our commitment to tailoring every aspect of the service ensures that it reflects the deceased's life, values, and personality. By working closely with families, we create meaningful and memorable tributes that provide comfort and respect during a difficult time. The Emotional Resonance of Music Music has a profound effect on our emotions, and it plays a crucial role in creating a memorable and meaningful funeral service. Whether it’s a classical piece, a beloved hymn, or a contemporary song, music helps encapsulate the essence of the individual’s life, offering comfort and connection for those grieving. Personalized Selection: Choosing the right music can create an atmosphere of reflection and celebration. We work closely with families to understand their loved one’s musical preferences and passions, enabling us to suggest selections that will truly reflect their spirit. Creating a Meaningful Atmosphere: Music sets the tone for the service, guiding the emotional journey of the attendees. A well-chosen piece can evoke memories, bring solace, and provide an avenue for expressing feelings that words might struggle to convey. This can be particularly healing for those in mourning, offering a channel for their emotions. Integrating Music into the Service From prelude to postlude, music can be seamlessly woven throughout the funeral service to enhance its emotional impact and structure. Prelude and Postlude: The prelude sets the stage as guests arrive, creating an ambiance of quiet reflection. Conversely, the postlude can serve as a gentle farewell, leaving attendees with a sense of peace as they depart. During the Ceremony: Throughout the ceremony, music can punctuate moments of silence, accompany reading, or provide a backdrop for personal reflections and eulogies. These musical interludes can help to frame the service, marking different segments and allowing for moments of contemplation. Live Performances vs. Recorded Music: Live music, whether it’s a soloist, choir, or instrumentalist, brings a personal touch to the service, making the experience even more unique. However, recorded music can be equally powerful, providing a consistent and high-quality sound. Diverse Musical Preferences Acknowledging our community's diverse cultural and religious backgrounds, We cater to a wide range of musical traditions and preferences. Religious Hymns: For many, traditional religious hymns provide comfort and a sense of continuity, linking the service to a greater spiritual framework. Secular Songs: Secular music can capture a broad spectrum of emotions and themes, reflecting the deceased's personality and the unique moments of their life. This could range from a favorite pop song to a timeless ballad that was significant to them. Cultural Traditions: Cultural heritage can significantly influence musical choices, with specific instruments, songs, or styles playing pivotal roles in the ceremony. Respecting and incorporating these aspects can make the service deeply meaningful to the bereaved. At Schilling Funeral Home & Cremation, we understand the powerful role that music plays in creating a personalized and memorable funeral service. Music has the ability to evoke deep emotions and can serve as a meaningful tribute to the life and legacy of a loved one. As trusted providers among funeral homes Morrison, IL, we are committed to guiding families in selecting the perfect music that resonates with the personality and values of the deceased. By working closely with you, we ensure that every service reflects the individuality of your loved one. Please don't hesitate to call us for further assistance in planning a funeral.